Chopstick Lessons Part IV: Aw that's cute. Or is it?

The next morning I arrived for the lunch shift and Antonia was the lone server on the clock. She smiled tiredly at me as I walked past her to hang my coat. A few minutes later she cornered me in the back and told me she didn’t think it was going to work. She had spoke to a lawyer and it turns out there were a number of small issues that would most likely keep us from being married any time soon. I thought I’d be relieved but the news hit me more in a “huh, that’s too bad” kind of way. I teasingly asked her if we could still be friends and at first she didn’t get the sarcasm of what I was saying but the joke slowly washed over in synch with a smile. I wanted to give her a hug but didn’t have the courage to.

A few minutes later I was cleaning some wine glasses when I heard an unfamiliar laugh from the kitchen. I peeked around the corner to see who it was… kitchen uncle! Laughing? No way! I must be seeing / hearing things. Then I heard it again, and again I peeked around the corner. A Chinese kid who busses for us when he’s not in school was talking to the old man as he butchered chicken. Then I saw it, after the young guy had said something in a playful tone of voice kitchen uncle’s lips parted just slightly and a low “Ha. Ha.” boomed forward. Up until this point I had genuinely believed the old man was incapable of being happy. It’s cool to be wrong sometimes.

As the day went on I found myself thinking about Antonia and what could have been. I mean, I almost got married, shit. True it wasn’t exactly for traditional reasons but some of the mental images, though obviously highly romanticized, were quite enticing. Now whenever I’m around Antonia I feel as if my footing isn’t quite sure. I think I have a crush on her. I think the crush is just a byproduct of the fantastic images swirling in my head which resulted from her asking me a most ridiculous favor. I think I’m acting like a little boy and it’s pathetic. I think my coworkers see it and laugh at me while shaking their heads. I think I have a crush on her.

Fuck. I'm that guy.

fin

-Raw